Friday, 3 August 2012

How to get a life!

So, I'm sat here watching Cherry Healey on Sky Plus, and  I'm hearing:
"I feel really conflicted by that...I would want her [my daughter] to be looked after, but I'd want her be able to 100% stand on her own feet. And not rely him. And also to be prepared to look after him."

I couldn't agree more.

But to throw the matter of choice in.
Over parenting.

Pre-children. I held quite strong opinions.
That each should look out for each other.
United we stand.
End of.

So, then, someone, throws children into the equation.
And then it becomes dependant.
In my eyes, to the salary.
And the 'unfortunate'- who ever earns the lesser.
And the childcare bill.
And the lifestyle.
And the conclusion.

"I'd rather be happy with no money"
And this has always been my truth.
You live to your income.
You can appreciate the extravagance.
You can appreciate the simple extravagances.
More so.
The laughter.

I was brought up by, more or less, a full time parent. Until I reached secondary school. And a part time parent thereafter.
Did I appreciate it?
At the time? Of course not!

We have now choice. A childcare bill, £28k after tax.
How often will full time parenting not be the best option?
It has brought all sorts of things into the equation.
They have absolutely brought us to the lowest low.
And when I am working from home... they bring me to the highest-high,

We will work things through.
We will cope with three children. With a 22mth age difference,
Few have the benefit of this.
Nor cope with the challenges.
But, as always, we survive, and are the better, the stronger, and the happier for it.

I would love childcare to be more reasonable, to allow the full time carer to receive more respite.
I would love to feel less compromised as a full time working mother.
Am I the full time mother or the full time worker? Think this through and establish the compromise!
My one wish.
To have the benefit of time travel.
More so, I would like someone to tell me, that this is making a difference.
That the compromises we make now will receive their appreciation in the long term.

As if.

(one of my favourite E4 series of its time!)

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