Tuesday, 25 June 2013

The beginning

I sat there, late into the night,
listening to 'Wherever you may go'
Looking out to the sea.
The moon reflects so brightly onto the sea.
Someone joked yesterday that someone must have remembered to pay the electricity bill.
It is that bright.

I am thinking of Multiple Mummy.
Whether the energy of 500 women singing 'Firework' might have created the energy to make the moon a little brighter.
I was thinking of how brave she was, being able to think about her funeral.
And write about the possibility, even then, of life after her death.
Which obviously got me thinking to religion.

I know Multiple Mummy has written about what being a godparent meant to her.

And as always I am left pondering our children's forthcoming Christening.
And what that means to us.
Why we would like them to be Christened.

In some ways, you can't help by start at the finish, that that purely is the reason.
The sad thoughts that surround death, and the thought of others living on.

I have never felt so strongly about having the children christened than I did when Tom was having his surgery.
And yet it is still over two years on that we will be realising this commitment.
And oddly, all the things which made us wait, and then gave us the reason to do it now, well they're no longer there.
My brother can no longer get home, and Mr J's best friend can't make it.

And we've decided to go on.

Because that's the thing, it doesn't matter how near or how far.
The support we need to function gets us through.
Whether physical, emotional, near or far.

It is moments, these moments, sat alone, that I know that I'm not.
That we have created a family, which has the strength within it to see each of us to individual happiness.
And in doing so, make each other so happy.

I cannot explain the happiness that is to hear Seren laugh, when no-one else is in the room.
To hear the excitement all three reunite each morning.
And the warmth of the hug each time I return home.

We have created a bond.
That is greater than one lifetime.


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