Friday, 10 January 2014

How to disappoint a 4.5 year old

This Christmas was the first time I felt the children appreciated Christmas.
I don't doubt this will increase year on year.
After all I was the child who pretended to sleep, and at 3am tried to open my presents quietly.
Fortunately, for their parents, once my children are asleep that it is. And the penny takes at least a minute to drop after they wake.
It really is the best minute.

After Father Christmas granted all of Seren's wishes it seems the game has changed.

January is birthday season. Mr J, Tom, Seb and Nana Windows all celebrate another year.
And so, as soon as twelfth night is gone, thoughts move to birthdays.

And, the conversations begin.

"For my birthday I would like pixie dust."
Quick Pinterest search later.
"Wow, look at this Pixie Dust. Isn't it lovely?"
"Yes, that's just what I want. It will mean I can fly."
Trying to rationalise didn't work out so well.
"It's ok mummy. If you can't get me pixie dust I'll just ask Father Christmas."
As we drove home from Mr J's birthday meal the conversation managed to move on to Seren's birthday (doff hat to Seren).

"I would like a mermaid outfit. Like Ariel."
Not one to learn from previous experience I consider this a realistic expectation.
"That sounds like a fab idea."
"Thanks mummy."
I am also benefiting from the knowledge that I have bagged Seren an Ariel doll in the sales and start counting my brownie points.
"She thinks she'll be able to swim underwater in it" comes the hushed, through gritted teeth, message from my husband.
Quickly covering this eventuality "You'll be able to wear it to your birthday party and look really special, won't you?"
Never ask a question.
"No mummy. I'll fall over. I need to be in water for the fin to work. If I wore it to my party I'd fall over."
Too clever.
"The thing is Seren, I can get you a wonderful Mermaid outfit to wear to your party, but I don't think I can find one that can help you swim underwater."
"That's ok mummy. I'll just wait until Christmas."
"Well, the thing is Seren, I don't know if it's going to be possible. What if mummy finds you a mermaid costume and an Ariel swimming costume?"
"Will it have a fin to swim underwater?"
"No. You need to practice at swimming lessons."
"It's ok mummy. I'll just wait till Christmas. Father Christmas can bring my mermaid costume and pixie dust."

Mummy. Fail.

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