Thursday, 23 January 2014

Speaking too soon, and trying not to be worried

So, yesterday the health visitor came for the three year check up.
And, as you'll know from my post, I was so proud of their behaviour, interaction, and how fortunate we've been to have such wonderful children.

Whilst she was here, I discussed the referral we had been given. For Tom to see a pediatrician.
I went to the GP before Christmas about a few 'niggles' I had about Tom. None affecting his health or well being, just niggles.
One resulted in a referral. As an extreme example, Spina Bifida was mentioned, as justifying the need for a pediatrician to be involved but nothing to worry about.
On Tuesday morning I had a phone call, an appointment had become free for today.

At 9am we were met by the most wonderful doctor. Who spent time getting to know Tom, exploring the medical and family history, and the reason for the appointment.
She examined Tom and they had lots of fun seeing what Tom could do physically.
Tom was in his element, I felt like I was at a children's party.
Whilst the doctor was content, we agreed, just to draw a line under it, an ultrasound would be scheduled and a follow up appointment to confirm what did or didn't need to happen.

As I went back to reception to sort the appointments, and my mum took Seb to the loo as they had been patiently waiting, I didn't really expect to see the doctor coming back to see me.

The long and short of it, would I mind taking Tom across for an ECG if time allowed.
When examining Tom she had heard a heart murmur which she'd like checked out.

That heart murmur.
I felt like a shite parent (I have never sworn on this blog but this was it).
Every time I've taken Tom to the doctor when ill they've detected the murmur.
"Bring him back when he's better so we can have another look."
Mr J did take him back, we were reassured it was fine.

I felt shite that I wasn't surprised.
The only, significant, difference was that at 100% healthy she'd heard it.

We went over to cardiology.
Fortunately we were at the hospital which, prior to retirement, my mum used to work.
She took Seb off to see 'the ladies' who the boys have met numerous time before over coffee.
We waited.
And Tom was an absolute star.

Tom was given his magic heart reading to take home.
I was given one to take back to the Children's Centre.
As I handed it over, I reassured myself that on both counts, the reason I thought we were there, and the reason we were still there, Tom is nothing other than a healthy, energetic child.

And yet, it's that horrible waiting.
For the cardiologist to get in touch.
For an ultrasound to be scheduled.

It was too many moons ago, but Tom's last ultrasound resulted in us immediately being admitted.
We've come so far.
But, my children, they're still my babies.

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